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disclaimer for lawyers and dumbasses: What follows is a parody. The celebrity impersonations are not only awful, lame and down right stupid but they are in no way intended to reflect the thoughts, lies, beliefs, distortions, exhibitions, talents, views, intelligence or anything else of the person being mimicked. It's all in good clean fun and we are an equal opportunity offender. The thoughts, views and prejudices contained in these parodies do not necessarily reflect those of antiMUSIC, the targets of the parody, the easter bunny, the fat guy down the street, Elton John, The Queen, iconoclast entertainment group or our sponsors. This is simply silliness for you to waste your time reading. Then again that's what makes up 90% of television too! If you are sucked into paying a large amount of money to have 100 channels and still have nothing to watch then you will understand. Marx was wrong, television is the opiate of the masses. Celebs that are parodied here should be honored and their lawyers and those that read this must understand that we have no idea what they think on certain issues, nor do we care. They are celebs, meant to entertain and they do so indirectly here (since they didn't actually contribute no compensation will be forthcoming) but to hammer the point home once again, before you begin, remember what you are about to read is complete bullshit! And so is most of what you see and hear on network news programs.  Speaking of which, our parody of the Fox News network, which claims to be fair and balances is yet another piece of fun. While compared to the leftist leaning alternate news networks, they are fair and balance it is true that they do have a center right bias. Then again, they do allow the left to be represented by intelligent people at least. While the other networks tend to get wackos like Pat Bucannan and B-1 Bob to represent the right (they don't) and The Chicago 7 don't represent the left either. It was amazing that Juan Williams gained several IQ points when he moved over to Fox. But that is all totally besides the point. There is plenty to make fun of on TV and that's what this is all about.... FUN.  nothing more nothing less. No defamation or any other legal terms are intended. This disclaimer is a perfect example of why we need to have tort reform. Lawyers will sue over anything and we have to put in longwinded disclaimers in to cover our asses.  silly-tv isn't for everyone. Consult your doctor to see if silly-tv is right for you. Side effects may include head ache, nausea, general disdain for the world, depression, soar throat from yelling at your screen, death by stupidity or laughter or cause large men dressed in mice suits to descend from black stealth helicopters and take you away. This isn't true, neither are most Oliver Stone films. if you decide to believe this we can't stop you but it wasn't intended that way. Then again if you buy this as legit, you probably believe that network news hacks like Dan Rather are real journalists.  And if you find that this isn't funny, rest assured that most sitcoms and Jerry Seinfeld's standup bits aren't funny either. 


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News Reports
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Day in Rock:
Van Halen Vs Adele- Sharon Osbourne Addresses Black Sabbath Controversy- New Slipknot Album Not Coming Soon- Beach Boys Reunion Kick Off at The Grammys- more

Day in Pop Lady Gaga Set For New Tour- Don Cornelius Suicide Confirmed- Katy Perry and Russell Brand Reach Comprehensive Written Settlement- Ray J Camp Deny Attack- more

B Sides: Howard Stern Van Halen Special Online- Ozzy Discusses Iommi's Cancer Battle on Radio Station Launch- Q&A With Slash- Lars Explains Metallica Experimenting- more

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Road Trip: Feel the Magic - Alamos, Mexico's Festival Ortiz Tirado

Elvis Found Alive

Rock Reads: Dirty Deeds: My Life Inside/Outside of AC/DC

Scorpions - Comeblack

Room Service: Chicago, Ohio, Missouri and Quebec

MorleyView: Ana Kefr

A Marriage Between Music and Movies Part III: Cameron Crowe's Top 10 Greatest Hits

RIP: Etta James - The Dreamer

The Doors - Mr. Mojo Risin': The Story of L.A. Woman

Soki2u - Dancing through the Needle's Eye

Cameron Crowe's Greatest Hits Part II (25-11)

Howlin' Wolf - Smokestack Lightning: The Complete Chess Masters 1951-1960

Passport: Forty Winks- Giorgio Tuma- I Build Collapsible Mountains- Spring Offensive

A Marriage Between Music and Movies: Cameron Crowe's 'Greatest Hits' Part I (50-26)


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Today's Rock News
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Van Halen Vs Adele

Sharon Osbourne Addresses Black Sabbath Controversy

New Slipknot Album Not Coming Soon

Beach Boys Reunion Kick Off at The Grammys

Aerosmith and Stephen King Collaboration Suggested

Killswitch Engage Made Jesse Leach Audition

Foo Fighters and Deadmau5 Team Up For Grammys

Rundgren, Lukather, Rolie For Ringo's All Star Band

Paul McCartney Streaming Live Tonight

Disturbed Member Joins Mike Portnoy's Adrenaline Mob

Red Hot Chili Peppers To Headline Hangout Music Fest

Jon Anderson Responds To Yes Reunion Rumor

Van Halen Tour Invite Surprised Kool and the Gang

Luis Alberto Spinetta RIP

Karma To Burn Going on Tour in March

Cauldron React To Juno Nomination

Exhumed Hitting The Road With Cannibal Corpse

Strangler's Hugh Cornwell and Sex Pistol's Glen Matlock Tour

The Safety Fire Album Release Pushed Back

Singled Out: Fleming's Slip

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Today's Pop News
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Lady Gaga Set For New Tour

Don Cornelius Suicide Confirmed

Katy Perry and Russell Brand Reach Comprehensive Written Settlement

Ray J Camp Deny Bodyguard Attack

Kelly Clarkson Tops The Chart With Stronger

Lana Del Rey Makes Strong Debut

Adele Closing In On 20 Weeks On Top

Puddle of Mudd Singer's Wife Wants Prenup Tossed Out

Lupe Fiasco and Bilal To Joining Robert Glasper Experiment On Letterman

Pilar Sanders Sues Deion Over Attack

24 Creator's Wife Won't Serve Jail Time For Vehicular Manslaughter

Gary Busey Goes Bankrupt

Charlie Sheen's Winning Super Bowl Party

Alcatraz Star Parminder Nagra Getting Divorced

Eva Longoria in Hollywood Fender Bender

Nate Dogg Caregivers Win Default Judgment

Halle Berry Wants Court Permission To Leave Country With Daughter

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