Redeye: So we're in this club in Tokyo, the band, crew, my wife, friends, having a great time. Only dim red lights in the club. This beautiful Japanese girl is all over us, couldn't understand a damn thing she was saying but spoke for hours. So there's me, my wife, this girl, we're just being silly, whatever, friends are laughing and taking pictures... get back to the hotel the next morning, go to bed, soon after I'm hearing this "voom voom voom" noise a half-second apart, I'm moving back and forth with it, thinking to myself "wow, the water's choppy." Then I realize I'm in a hotel, not on a boat. F**king earthquake. We get out of bed, the first thing I do is throw on a pair of pants - I WILL not die with my dick out, f**k that. We stand in the doorway of the bathroom, I hold my wife and tell her "this is gonna be a very long 30 seconds, just hang tight..." and we wait. The building didn't crumble, we went back to bed.

The next time I saw my friends, the photos they took came up - they said "what was up with that girl?" Did you see the pictures? They showed me the pictures, and the white light of the camera flash revealed that our exquisite lady friend from the night before had some kind of super outbreak of conjunctiva goin' on, I mean one of her eyes was so red it looked like a crime scene photo. The lights in the club were red, so it canceled out the redness of her eye, no one could tell...! And if we died in the earthquake, we never would have known. It makes ya wonder - when people die, what little bit of discovery do they miss out on, what would they have learned if they lived one more day? So deep... For me, it was that the little Japanese girl had a red eye. Great.

Red Eye

Well it started with a sound I never heard before
Then the pushin' and the pullin' me across the floor
I said the last thing we did the night before we die
Was a little drunk girl with a big red eye

It was another late night in Tokyo
In another dark club after another show
If the morning light could have got inside
We would have seen the girl had a big red eye

So we crashed out a little bit before the quake
Then I held you tight while the hotel shaked
If the walls came down we would have surely died
Never knowin' the girl had a big red eye

But we lived to see ourselves another day
And we laughed out loud with a foot in the grave
Ya see, the camera had a flash and the pictures don't lie
That little drunk girl had a big red eye

And the toxic waste spilled into the sea
And the air stuck like flypaper to me
It's all one big roller-coaster ride
And last night she got on with a big red eye

The greatest lessons we could learn in life
Are always served the day after we die
All I would have missed as I hit the sky
Was that the little drunk girl had a big red eye

Hearing is believing, so go here and grab a free MP3, learn more about Bumblefoot and the new album and buy 'Abnormal.' It's worth the price of admission!