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�Has It Really Been 10 Years?�
Posted 4-08-04 - Dr Fever

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April 8th, 1994. I was one month and 5 days short of my 17th birthday and a Junior in High School. The day was just like any other...get up around 6, take a shower, eat some breakfast and make the 5 minute drive to school.  Went through the day like I would any other day...7 class periods, lunch, bulls***ting about nothing with friends� ya know, nothing out of the ordinary. Came home that afternoon like I would any other afternoon. That was the point that my day became anything but �usual� or �ordinary.� It wasn�t until I got home that I found out that the frontman of my favorite band was dead. The voice of my generation, the closest thing (in terms of cultural impact) that I�d seen to John Lennon in my lifetime, had been forever silenced.

It�s been 10 years since that day. 10 years since Kurt Cobain died. A lot has changed since then in the world of music, trends have come and gone, bands have rose to the top and just as quickly fallen without so much as a whimper.... But, even 10 years later there is one thing that hasn�t changed: 

There are still many questions left un-answered surrounding the death of Kurt...and the possibility of these questions ever getting answered becomes more and more slim as each year passes.

I know many times in my writings on this site I have flat out done what everyone in the mainstream media has either refused to do or haven�t had the guts to do because they�re afraid of potential lawsuits: I have pointed the finger directly at Courtney Love. But, let me clear one thing up. I DO NOT think Courtney pulled the trigger...but I DO believe she knows who did. And the answer is NOT Kurt Cobain. If you�ve ever read the timetable of events leading up to and after Kurt�s death over at cobaincase.com then you have an idea of where I�m coming from. Think about it; she was pissed at Kurt because Kurt was apparently seeing her for what she was: An opportunistic, no-talent tramp who had latched onto the BIGGEST rock star in the world (a label he very much despised) in an obvious attempt to launch her own music career and pad her bank account and Kurt was supposedly talking divorce. She was also pissed at Kurt for flat-out refusing a headlining tour that would have brought in somewhere around 9 million dollars!

Look, I could sit here for the entire length of this and throw darts at Courtney and/or quote details from cobaincase.com, but I�m not going to do that. I�ll leave it up to you, if you have any interest in the questions still surrounding the death of Kurt Cobain. I highly recommend you visit cobaincase.com, or any of the other sites that are linked up from there.  They can talk about these things better than I.

I guess the reason I wrote this column this month was to do something in the memory of Kurt. Yeah yeah...I know it�s clichéd to do that, and I fully expect to get flamed all to hell for it. But, I really don�t give a s***. It is my observation that the LARGE majority of the people who bash Nirvana, or bash Kurt or talk s*** on the people who DO things like devote an entire column to remembering Kurt is this: They are either 1)A dyed in the wool 80�s metalhead who couldn�t get over the fact that Nirvana spearheaded a revolution against their beloved genre of choice. OR B)were too young between 1991 and 1994 to fully appreciate what was going on. And that�s perfectly fine. This doesn�t apply to ALL Nirvana/Kurt haters� but it applies to largest majority of them. However, for those of us who truly loved (and still love for that matter) what went on in those 3 years we have to do things like take a moment to remember Kurt and his music. Maybe it keeps us feeling like we�re teenagers again, who knows. But, in my case, I think that applies. But of course, also, we need to do that so that someone will ALWAYS keep asking those questions and not accept the half-assed explanations that have been given to us for the last 10 years.

Is it possible that Kurt Cobain, unable to deal with massive stomach pains that had troubled him for years combined with the celebrity he screamed he didn�t want, took his own life? Sure it is. Depression combined with Heroin can do lead a man to damn near anything I suppose. But I for one will never buy into it. I for one will continue to ask the questions and not settle for the bulls***. I owe it to my inner-teenager...at least that�s how I see it.

Rest In Peace, Kurt. It�s been 10 years, but we haven�t forgotten. And we�re not about to.
 

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