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Former KsE Singer Howard Jones Opens Up About His Suicide Attempt

07/07/2015
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Killswitch Engage and current Devil You Know frontman Howard Jones was the featured guest on the 100th episode of Hatebreed frontman Jamey Jasta's The Jasta Show podcast.

During the interview Jones spoke about his past struggles with anxiety and depression and discussed his suicide attempt. Jones tells Jasta (via Lambgoat), "I've had anxiety and depression since I was a young teenager. Being a singer and doing what I do, did not help. And then actually having the blessing of luck to get known and actually have success doing it, I'll always be grateful for it. But it became just an absolute burden for me.

"Look, I remember being like a teenager and I would be walking down the street and there would be people walking towards me and I would walk across the street just to avoid them-as a teenager I did that. And so, you can imagine how it became once there's people yelling my name and everything… I couldn't go to grocery stores, I couldn't go to the mall, I would get stared at in movie theaters."

He then recalled his suicide attempt, "It went from being an underground thing, it was a small community, it was the thing that we shared together. It went to like this big public thing. Then after awhile it just got to the point it's like 'man, I can't handle this.' And so just alone, your mind just goes crazy. At least it did for me and there's some people who handle it a lot better than I did, but me, I did not handle it well. I remember still living at my old, old apartment and-I don't even know if I've ever really talked about this-Yeah, it's just someone knew what I was doing and called the police cause I almost blew my head off. I pulled out my .44, I loaded it, I was done. If they hadn't knocked on the door, I was gone.

"The cops came and broke down my door and stopped me. So needless to say, I ended up spending a little bit of time in one of the fabled mental institutions. Have I ever mentioned that before? I might have to you, but I've never publicly talked about it." Read more and listen to the entire episode here.

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