Who Won Grammys?

(antiMusic) It felt a little like 1983 when the Police opened the Grammy telecast with their classic "Roxanne". That was the highlight as most of the night showed how far music has fallen in the 20+ years since they scored that hit. There were a few exceptions but that definitely didn't include Mary J. Blige's insanely long ramblings where she thanked everyone on earth and heaven. Like the energizer bunny she kept going and going even after the producers brought on the music to get her off the stage. Milk those 15 minutes! It's also great to see the Academy ignoring music sales trends with an overabundance of rap/R&B awards to help try to bolster the sagging genres, while only giving cursory recognition to genres that sell more (e.g. rock, alternative and metal). Here is a quick look:

Alternative Rock Grammy categories: 1
Alternative Unit Sales in 2006: 109,672(000)

Rock Grammy Categories: 5
Rock Unit Sales in 2006: 170,726(000)

R&B Grammy Categories: 8
R&B Unit Sales in 2006: 117,005(000)

Metal/Hard Rock Grammy Categories: 2
Metal Unit Sales in 2006: 61,557(000)

Rap Grammy Categories: 5
Rap Unit Sales in 2006: 59,534(000)

So Rap which undersold Metal gets 5 Grammys and Metal gets 1 (2 if you count hard rock). R&B which undersold Rock gets 8 Grammys and Rock only gets 5. What about Alternative which had almost double the sale of Rap? They get only 1! All this and some clown for a mainstream publication was crying last week that Rap and R&B were UNDER represented! I won't mention the pub to spare the stupid. Now you have no need to wonder why people don't take these things seriously.

Here is the complete list of winners for those that follow such things or need to be told what to listen to.

Hard Rock Performance: "Woman" - Wolfmother.

Metal Performance: "Eyes of the Insane" - Slayer.

Solo Rock Vocal Performance: "Someday Baby" - Bob Dylan.

Rock Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocal: "Dani California" - Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Rock Instrumental Performance: "The Wizard Turns On ... " - the Flaming Lips.

Rock Song: "Dani California" - Flea, John Frusciante, Anthony Kiedis and Chad Smith (Red Hot Chili Peppers)

Alternative Music Album: "St. Elsewhere" - Gnarls Barkley.

Producer of the Year: Rick Rubin.

Album Of The Year: "Taking The Long Way" - Dixie Hicks
Rick Rubin, producer; Richard Dodd, Jim Scott & Chris Testa, engineers/mixers; Richard Dodd, mastering engineer.

Record of the Year: "Not Ready To Make Nice" - Dixie Hicks
Rick Rubin, producer; Richard Dodd, Jim Scott & Chris Testa, engineers/mixers.

Song of the Year: "Not Ready to Make Nice" - Martie Maguire, Natalie Maines, Emily Robison and Dan Wilson (Dixie Hicks).

New Artist: Carrie Underwood.

Pop Vocal Album: "Continuum" - John Mayer.

Pop Collaboration With Vocals: "For Once in My Life" - Tony Bennett and Stevie Wonder.

Country Album: "Taking the Long Way" - Dixie Chicks.

Short Form Music Video: "Here It Goes Again" - OK Go.

Long Form Music Video: "Wings for Wheels: The Making of Born to Run" - Bruce Springsteen.

Recording Package: "10,000 Days" - Adam Jones, art director (Tool).

Boxed or Special Limited Edition Package: "Stadium Arcadium" - Flea, John Frusciante, Anthony Kiedis, Chad Smith and Matt Taylor, art directors (Red Hot Chili Peppers).

Album Notes: "If You Got to Ask, You Ain't Got It!" Dan Morgenstern, album notes writer (Fats Waller).

Historical Album: "Lost Sounds: Blacks and the Birth of the Recording Industry 1891-1922."

Engineered Album, Classical: "Elgar: Enigma Variations; Britten: the Young Person's Guide to the Orchestra, Four Sea Interludes" - Michael Bishop, engineer (Paavo Jarvi and Cincinnati Symphony Orchestra).

Producer of the Year, Classical: Elaine Martone.

Classical Album: "Mahler: Symphony No. 7" - Michael Tilson Thomas, conductor, Andreas Neubronner, producer (San Francisco Symphony).

Orchestral Performance: "Mahler: Symphony No. 7" - Michael Tilson Thomas, conductor (San Francisco Symphony).

Opera Recording: "Golijov: Ainadamar: Fountain of Tears" - Robert Spano, conductor, Kelley O'Connor and Dawn Upshaw; Valerie Gross and Sid McLauchlan, producers (Women of the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra Chorus, Atlanta Symphony Orchestra).

Choral Performance: "Part: Da Pacem" - Paul Hillier, conductor (Estonian Philharmonic Chamber Choir).

Instrumental Soloist(s) Performance (with Orchestra): "Messiaen: Oiseaux Exotiques (Exotic Birds)" - John McLaughlin Williams, conductor; Angelin Chang (Cleveland Chamber Symphony).

Instrumental Soloist Performance (without Orchestra): "Chopin: Nocturnes" - Maurizio Pollini.

Chamber Music Performance: "Intimate Voices" - Emerson String Quartet.

Small Ensemble Performance: "Padilla: Sun of Justice" - Peter Rutenberg, conductor (Los Angeles Chamber Singers' Cappella).

Classical Vocal Performance: "Rilke Songs" - Lorraine Hunt Lieberson (Peter Serkin), track from Lieberson: Rilke Songs, The Six Realms, Horn Concerto.

Classical Contemporary Composition: "Golijov: Ainadamar: Fountain of Tears" - Osvaldo Golijov (Robert Spano).

Classical Crossover Album: "Simple Gifts" - Bryn Terfel (London Voices; London Symphony Orchestra).

Latin Pop Album (tie): "Adentro" - Arjona. "Limon Y Sal" - Julieta Venegas.

Latin Rock, Alternative or Urban Album: "Amar Es Combatir" - Mana.

Tropical Latin Album: "Directo Al Corazon" - Gilberto Santa Rosa.

Mexican/Mexican-American Album: "Historias De Mi Tierra" - Pepe Aguilar.

Tejano Album: "Sigue El Taconazo" - Chente Barrera.

Norteno Album: "Historias Que Contar" - Los Tigres Del Norte.

Banda Album: "Mas Alla Del Sol" - Joan Sebastian.

Rap Solo Performance: "What You Know" - T.I.

Rap Performance by a Duo or Group: "Ridin" - Chamillionaire featuring Krayzie Bone.

Rap/Sung Collaboration: "My Love" - Justin Timberlake featuring T.I.

Rap Song: "Money Maker" - Christopher Bridges and Pharrell Williams (Ludacris featuring Pharrell).

Gospel Performance: "Victory" - Yolanda Adams.

Gospel Song: "Imagine Me" - Kirk Franklin (Kirk Franklin).

Rock or Rap Gospel Album: "Turn Around" - Jonny Lang.

Pop/Contemporary Gospel Album: "Wherever You Are" - Third Day.

Southern, Country, or Bluegrass Gospel Album: "Glory Train" - Randy Travis.

Traditional Gospel Album: "Alive in South Africa" - Israel and New Breed.

Contemporary R&B Gospel Album: "Hero" - Kirk Franklin.

Traditional Blues Album: "Risin' With the Blues" - Ike Turner.

Contemporary Blues Album: "After the Rain" - Irma Thomas.

Compilation Soundtrack Album for Motion Picture, Television or Other Visual Media: "Walk the Line" - Joaquin Phoenix and Various Artists.

Score Soundtrack Album for Motion Picture, Television or Other Visual Media: "Memoirs of a Geisha" - John Williams, composer.

Song Written for Motion Picture, Television or Other Visual Media: "Our Town (From Cars)" - Randy Newman ( James Taylor).

Instrumental Composition: "A Prayer for Peace" - John Williams, composer (John Williams), from "Munich Soundtrack."

Instrumental Arrangement: "Three Ghouls" - Chick Corea, arranger (Chick Corea), from "The Ultimate Adventure."

Instrumental Arrangement Accompanying Vocalist(s): "For Once in My Life" - Jorge Calandrelli, arranger (Tony Bennett and Stevie Wonder), from "Duets: an American Classic."

Traditional Folk Album: "We Shall Overcome the Seeger Sessions" - Bruce Springsteen.

Contemporary Folk/Americana Album: "Modern Times" - Bob Dylan.

Native American Music Album: "Dance With the Wind" - Mary Youngblood.

Hawaiian Music Album: "Legends of Hawaiian Slack Key Guitar Live From Maui" - Various Artists.

Reggae Album: "Love Is My Religion" - Ziggy Marley.

Traditional World Music Album: "Blessed" - Soweto Gospel Choir.

Contemporary World Music Album: "Wonder Wheel" - the Klezmatics.

Polka Album: "Polka in Paradise" - Jimmy Sturr and His Orchestra.

Musical Show Album: "Jersey Boys."

Engineered Album, Non-Classical: "At War With the Mystics" - the Flaming Lips and Dave Fridmann, engineers (The Flaming Lips).

Remixed Recording, Non-Classical: "Talk (Thin White Duke Mix)" - Jacques Lu Cont, remixer (Coldplay).

Surround Sound Album: "Morph the Cat" - Darcy Proper, surround mastering.

Producer of the Year, Non-Classical: Rick Rubin.

Musical Album for Children: "Catch That Train" - Dan Zanes and Friends.

Spoken Word Album for Children: "Blah Blah Blah: Stories About Clams, Swamp Monsters, Pirates and Dogs" - Bill Harley.

Spoken Word Album (Includes Poetry, Audio Books and Story Telling). (Tie): "Our Endangered Values: America's Moral Crisis (Jimmy Carter)" - Jimmy Carter. "With Ossie and Ruby: In This Life Together (Ossie Davis and Ruby Dee)" - Ossie Davis and Ruby Dee.

Comedy Album: "The Carnegie Hall Performance" - Lewis Black.

New Age Album: "Amarantine" - Enya.

Contemporary Jazz Album: "The Hidden Land" - Bela Fleck and the Flecktones.

Jazz Instrumental Solo: "Some Skunk Funk" - Michael Brecker.

Jazz Instrumental Album, Individual or Group: "The Ultimate Adventure" - Chick Corea.

Large Jazz Ensemble Album: "Some Skunk Funk" - Randy Brecker With Michael Brecker, Jim Beard, Will Lee, Peter Erskine, Marcio.

Latin Jazz Album: "Simpatico" - the Brian Lynch/Eddie Palmieri Project.

Pop Instrumental Performance: "Mornin'" - George Benson (& Al Jarreau).

Pop Instrumental Album: "Fingerprints" - Peter Frampton.

Dance Recording: "Sexy Back" - Justin Timberlake and Timbaland.

Electronic/Dance Album: "Confessions on a Dance Floor" - Madonna.

Traditional Pop Vocal Album: "Duets: an American Classic" - Tony Bennett.

Male R&B Vocal Performance: "Heaven" - John Legend.

R&B Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocals: "Family Affair" - (Sly and the Family Stone), John Legend, Joss Stone With Van Hunt.

Traditional R&B Vocal Performance: "God Bless the Child" - George Benson and Al Jarreau featuring Jill Scott.

Urban/Alternative Performance: "Crazy" - Gnarls Barkley.

R&B Song: "Be Without You" - Johnta Austin, Mary J. Blige, Bryan-Michael Cox and Jason Perry (Mary J. Blige).

Contemporary R&B Album: "B'Day" - Beyonce.

Female Country Vocal Performance: "Jesus, Take the Wheel" - Carrie Underwood.

Male Country Vocal Performance: "The Reason Why" - Vince Gill.

Country Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocal: "Not Ready to Make Nice" - Dixie Chicks.

Country Collaboration With Vocals: "Who Says You Can't Go Home" - Bon Jovi and Jennifer Nettles.

Country Instrumental Performance: "Whiskey Before Breakfast" - Bryan Sutton and Doc Watson.

Country Song: "Jesus, Take the Wheel" - Brett James, Hillary Lindsey and Gordie Sampson (Carrie Underwood).

Bluegrass Album: "Instrumentals" - Ricky Skaggs and Kentucky Thunder.

Jazz Vocal Album: "Turned to Blue" - Nancy Wilson.

Female Pop Vocal Performance: "Ain't No Other Man" - Christina Aguilera.

Male Pop Vocal Performance: "Waiting on the World to Change" - John Mayer.

Pop Performance by a Duo or Group With Vocal: "My Humps" - Black Eyed Peas.

Rap Album: "Release Therapy" - Ludacris.

R&B Album: "The Breakthrough" - Mary J. Blige.

Female R&B Vocal Performance: "Be Without You" - Mary J. Blige.

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