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  KISS Kondoms? 


06-06-02 antiGUY
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Just when you thought Gene Simmons hadn�t left any merchandising stone left unturned he comes out with his latest and far from greatest way to separate fans from their cash, The KISS Kondoms. 

With a new magazine available at newsstands aptly named �Tongue� Gene has also set his merchandising sights on safe sex with the introduction of the KISS Kondom, which fans can buy from the KISS website. 

The first edition of the KISS �Rock �N� Rubbers� line features a masked Gene on the condom package, which you can open to reveal a bright red prophylactic that is said to be inspired by Gene�s famous tongue. That�s the same tongue that when asked by Oprah how long it was, Gene responded, �Long enough to make me your closest friend�. 

More KISS Kondoms are on the way including a heavy duty one called "Love Gun Protection," that is said to feature a full group photo on the wrapper and then you will be able to get the �Studded Paul�, a condom of the ribbed variety that will have Paul�s starry eyed mug on the wrapper.  But what about Ace and Peter?  Peter can have one with whiskers that wears out after five minutes and Ace can have one that explodes on climax! Think about the fun you can have with those as you roll around on the floor with old KISS songs like �Dr Love� on in the background to get you in the mood! 

The KISS Kondoms are being produced by Condomania, a company that is said to also be planning a full line of �Rock �N� Rubbers� that will include series for p.diddy and Ozzy.  A p.diddy rubber? Will it be a half-assed knock off of the KISS Kondom? And Ozzy? Perhaps this will start a whole new line of collectors and traders, just imagine the kids on the school yard, �I give you two Genes for one Ozzy.� 

When asked by Reuters about KISS Kondoms Gene said, "Sex is always embarrassing for people. So when a guy whips out a KISS condom and there's Gene Simmons' tongue hanging out it lightens up the situation." Sure, Gene. 

That�s not all, Gene is also looking into taking on Ralph Lauren with yes, you guessed it, KISS Perfume. According to the New York Daily News, Gene is planning to launch a new line of perfume. "KISS just sounds perfect for a fragrance," Gene told the paper at the FiFi Awards. When asked how he would come up with the right fragrance Gene responded, "You start with a woman and sniff. You get lots of beautiful women together and sniff them all. Somewhere in there is the right sniff."

For a guy that is supposedly retiring Gene seems to be pretty active in cashing in on the KISS image.

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