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The lab is under a heightened state of Security. Security Cameras are in place, watching all possible angles. Retinal Identification systems are on order and will be here shortly. A state of the art airline radar system has just been installed on the computer so I can watch planes in the immediate area while I’m surfing the net. Yes we live in strange times now, and Dr Fever is taking no chances and keeping the already fortified Lab all that much more secure. To keep my mind off the events of September 11th I find myself using the computer more and watching more TV than normal. Of course, old reliable "WWF Raw" is still there on Monday nights..but, like Bob Dylan said, "the times they are a changing" with one of my favorite television programs. And it ain’t necessarily for the better.

Wrestling is and always has been a major soap opera for the male contingent of the world. We enjoy watching grown, bulked up men beating the hell out of other grown, bulked up men. Putting them through tables. Leaping from the top of a 20 foot cage while forcing their body to do a backwards flip (i.e. a Moonsault). And so forth and so on. But, lately, wrestling has gotten to be as watered down and homogenized as everything else on TV, why? Well, the brain trust of the WWF (Vince McMahon, et al) decided to follow the lead of the MTV's of the world and gear their product to the younger market and suck more money out of society. That is the main problem. In doing this, they're slowly (but surely) beginning to turn their back on the real fans..the one's who've been watching, loving and buying this shit for the large majority of their lives. People like that are left to wonder; "What the hell?!" most of the time. Yes, we still enjoy the show, and yes we still tune in, and yes we still buy the shit. But, again, things are changing.

The first sign of this was when WWFE (the New York Stock Exchange name for all business ventures under the World Wrestling Federation umbrella) decided to change their TV deal. They sold themselves to Viacom (yes, the same corporate bastards who own and run MTV). Of course, being under the umbrella of Viacom means you have to make certain changes..to hold the attention of your new target audiences. Translated that means you've got to make your matches a LOT shorter and find other ways to keep the attention span lacking masses that you've targeted from changing the channel. Enter step two...

As someone who grew up watching wrestling since I was 8 years old or so (with a slight lapse for awhile there..thanks HBK for showing me the light and bringing me back to it), I can remember a time when the actual WRESTLING was what was important. When a body slam would be a devastating finisher. But, those days are gone. Now, you gotta jump from 50 feet in the air through six flaming tables just to get a two count. Granted, I enjoy that. It makes for good entertainment. But, where are the real matches? Non Existent that's where. Or, at the very least, few are far (very far) between. The biggest part of this stage is the move to use 'real' songs for entrance themes. Granted, there was a time when all kinds of wrestling did this: The Rock and Roll Express using 'Fight For Your Right to Party', The Road Warriors using 'Iron Man', etc. But, today it's just a little ridiculous. I understand the need to attach a song to a wrestler that the fans can instantly recognize, but is it necessary to use so many shitty songs? I mean really, do we REALLY need to see Stephanie McMahon, she of the Billion Dollar Breasts, saunter to the ring for another display of HORRIBLE mic skills while Drowning Pools 'Bodies' blasts out of our TV's? Well, if the song were good and not just Nu Metal Band Of The Week it might be different. The madness goes on. Edge (one of my two favorite wrestlers by the way) is currently using the new single from Rob Zombie...Test (a marginally good in ring performer) is eventually going to be using music supplied by (*gulp*) SLAYER (*hangs head an ponders why Slayer would lend their name to such a thing*), The Dudley Boyz are using a song by Naughty By Nature, Triple H (my favorite wrestler by the way) is using his own, personalized song by Motorhead (i enjoy this song actually..it's good. But, I had to throw it in) The list goes on...but, the question is, where does it end? Will the wrestling powers that be not be happy until they've driven away all their loyal, long time fans and replaced them with a new generation of nitwit 12 to 17 year old? 

I'll close with this point..the be all end all point as it were. The final straw in this homogenization of wrestling came when The Rock recorded his own Rap. Look, The Rock is an unbelievably talented performer in the ring and on the mic..no one can work a crowd quite like him. But The Rock should never,AND THE DOC MEANS NEVER! (sorry..couldn't be helped..haha.) be allowed to rap, sing or even yodel on a mic again. It a disgrace to the business and it's a disgrace to the fans..the loyal fans who support that business. Of course, as I write this, I'm planning on buying the next WWF CD that's released. So, I guess in the end, everyone gets sucked into the machine. *sigh*
 

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Questions, Comments and stupid reasons why Courtney didn't kill Kurt (HAHAHAHA) should be emailed to:  PureRockFury@antimusic.net
 
 

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