Bullet To The Heart just released their new EP, "Death, Oddities & Romance". To celebrate we asked Audrey Queen to tell us about on the track and she selected the deeply personal song, "Post Mortem." Here is the story:
I picked this song to talk about because it hits closer to my heart. Rather than talk about vampires or zombies, some of the themes on this new EP, I wanted to talk about my struggle with anxiety and depression that I poured into Post Mortem.
I want to take us back to 2017 when we first started our band Bullet To The Heart. We were 3 months into gearing up for our first Chicago House of Blues show when I was rushed to the hospital. I found out I had an 8 cm ovarian cyst that had burst and bled a liter of blood into my abdomen.
I had been struggling with depression since my parents divorce in 2006 and no longer wanted to be apart of this world. I had just started dating my drummer back in 2014 and had fell head over heels in love with him.
When the doctor rushed me in for emergency surgery, telling the nurses he needed to work quickly as I only had an hour left to live, I reached out into the universe and begged, for the first time in 11 years, to live.
I woke up in a hospital bed next to my boyfriend, looked over to the next bed and saw my mom laying there, and I breathed a sigh of relief that I had made it.
Post Mortem was written as if I would have died that day in 2017. It was to be my final goodbye to my family, and most importantly my soulmate, my heart, the humming whisper that makes me come back for more, my husband.
6 years later I am alive and healthy and because of my band and my husband I am thriving mentally. I still have my bad days but I submerge myself in my music and the family I have created, The Bloodline, to help me keep going. You are never alone.
Hearing is believing. Now that you know the story behind the song, listen and watch for yourself below and learn more about the EP here