J.Lo  The Mark of the Beast? by antiGUY

Ok, it’s gone far enough, the apocalypse will soon be at hand, the human race is sitting on the brink of insanity and will destroy itself from it’s own stupidity or lack of taste-- have your choice. I’m not talking about the craziness in the Middle East at the moment, although that is a major concern and something that should frighten everyone. Although, the subject matter at hand here may add more fuel to the anti-American fire when viewed from a foreigner. They call us decadent, shallow, ungodly, while they overlook all the good points about America, despite our detractors our systems gives the most opportunity to the most people, America is always first in line with humanitarian aid, the list goes on. But when they see some of the products of American “pop-culture” as perpetrated by the Entertainment industry, it’s no wonder they view it with distaste.  Ok sure they blindly believe that all American’s buy into this crap, when in reality it is only a small percentage, however, it is this “pop-culture” that is most visible. But I still wonder how we got from Elvis’s Pelvis to J.Lo’s hindquarters in a span of 50 years? 

Let me back up a bit. So there I was driving along Sunset Blvd, heading to the Cat Club for a show. A red light stops my progress right before I hit the strip with the House of Blues, Viper Room, Whiskey, etc, (you get the idea.) I look over and what do I see in all it’s horror stretched across a billboard? Yup, “J.Lo” the clothing line! 

Please someone explain this to me. A “B” rate actress gets a role-playing a slain singing star and then she gets delusions of grandeur and thinks she can be a pop star. Fast forward and then she thinks she is such a celebrity that she can pawn off cheap clothing at ridiculous prices? Did I miss something? Did the general public take a big hit of dope, or drop about 20 IQ points overnight while I wasn’t looking? 

The idea that Jennifer Lopez thinks that she is a pop singer is ludicrous enough, the worst part is there are enough people out there who have absolutely no regard for talented musicians and singers that they buy up the crap J.Lo is peddling. Where is it written that that “b” grade actresses with large hindquarters deserves a pop singing career, and that people would actually buy into it? Did I miss the class or something? Has the collective taste of the world really sunk this low? But it get worst, just the thought that impressionable young women (ok little girls) will run to the mall and actually use their parents money to help proliferate this farce has me at the point of wondering what in the hell has humanity come to? Is it Sodom and Gomorrah all over again? Has the decadence sunk to such a level that someone like Jennifer Lopez can land acting jobs, then succeed as a popstar, then use a stupid moniker like J.Lo and sell millions of records, then to add insult to injury we will soon see a drove of mindless teenage girls running around with pants that have three inches of padding in the rear end to make them look like J.Lo? 

Even one of the most evil of “diva trolls” Barbara Streisand never sunk this low. Perhaps, Jennifer Lopez’s business managers see the writing on the wall and are pushing her to cash in before people wake up and realize they have been buying crap from a second rate Tiffany? Salina, J.Lo is not! 

When will this insanity end? What’s next? J.Lo Magazine? Hell Rosie did it, why not J.Lo, then we can see her large rear end on the cover each month as we wait in line at the grocery store. How about a J.Lo “Butt Master” imagine the infomercial…. “Work those buns girls, size does matter!” What the world really needs is a J.Lo fast-food restaurant, “Get the J.Lo Burger.. it will go straight to your ass!”.  J.Lo Cola? It will basically be flat but have some bubbles at the bottom of the bottle. 

I don’t fault the impressionable youth who buy into this crap, I really don’t, .they don’t know any better. I blame their parents and the whole generation that grew up hippies listening to the Beatles, Led Zeppelin and the Who but now drive SUV’s, Volvos, MiniVans  and are what we call “Soccer Moms”. Those who  traded in their Bob Dylan CD’s for Celine Dion and Whitney Huston.  Maybe they smoked too much dope back in the day, but they sure have screwed up when it came to teaching their children about culture and music. J.Lo and Sea Lion aren’t too far removed; neither are Whitney, Cher and the queen of arrogant-self indulgence- Babs! So kids, if you find yourself helplessly sucked into this scam perpetrated by J.Lo, the record companies, the mainstream media and network TV, go look in your parents CD collection and see if you can find any Michael Bolton, Barry Manilow or Sea Lion Dion CD’s, then you will know you are but a victim. A product of your environment, where you parents sold out to mediocrity, made you suffer each night through hours of mindless sitcoms on TV and made you listen to what can be called, even being generous, fluff music. It is no wonder you grew up with no taste.  Your choice now is to either continue to buy into the big brother mindless crap that is the mainstream entertainment industry and continue to help marginally talented hacks like J.Lo get rich off of your stupidity and lack of musical knowledge and common sense and help sink music to new lows with each passing day or you can put that stuff where it belongs-in the garbage can and seek out some music and entertainment with substance and then laugh at your friends who are being suckered into this con that is “pop music” and “pop culture”. If you keep going on this way, you might buy into to other fads like pointless self help groups created by neurotics and foisted upon the weak minded(sure legitimate self help groups that deal with REAL problems like drug abuse and alcoholism are one thing, but the Adult Children of Cross Dressing Democrats?), of course you will have to pay for their help after they proclaim you have a problem. Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus and a sucker is born every minute. One self-help group we do need is for media sheep, we can help you here at antiMUSIC free of charge for that problem.  It’s your choice, but be careful wearing J.Lo clothing while walking down the street, someone who has had enough of the over commercialization of Generation X, Y and Z might snap and well you can leave the rest to your imagination, but it won’t be a pretty sight.. But I will leave you with one final thought, is J.Lo a sign of the times? Is it the mark of the beast? Is the harlot in the book of revelation the media? And the Beast with ten heads and seven crowns the entertainment conglomerates? Or maybe I just ate some bad pizza today and went off on a rant in left field? Whatever the foundation of this problem may be, it doesn’t bode well for the future as we sink further and further into the mediocre abyss that is mainstream entertainment. Ok off my soapbox now.. Go and sin no more. 
 

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